Mommy, what does counterproductive mean?

Child: Mommy, what does counterproductive mean?

Mommy: Well, it's like when your being a good girl and some random person says "Wow, your lucky to get such a well behaved child." and I think "Ya, because it as nothing to do with my parenting skills" but instead of just thinking it I say it out loud. You see then she'll definitively think that you were born well behaved because I was being so rude and you defiantly didn't get it from me even though that wasn't the message I actually wanted to convey. THAT is counterproductive!

Child: Oh ...

Sincerely yours forever,


Vanna <3

Stop Bullying Now, Pt 1: Statistics

With another school year coming to a close it's time for students to look back on their school year. With the statistics above it's likely that your child has been bullied, bullied others, or witnessed bullying at school.

I'll be posting a series of posts and links on the topic of harassment from both sides. The victim and the aggressor.


This post is meant as food for thought. Here are some additional statistics on the topic of bulling.

Bullying occurs at the same rate among special needs students as with regular students.

Only 36% of students will notify a teacher or adult of being bullied.

According to Professor Jamie M. Ostrov, "... frequent relational and physical aggression can begin as early as two and a half years of age and may be a relativity stable behavior during early childhood." 


Psychologist Dan Olweus of the University of Bergen in 1993 found that 60% of children in grades 6-9 that have regularly bullied others ended up having at least one criminal conviction by age 24.


Chronic child bullies are likely to maintain their behaviors into adulthood and diminish their ability to sustain positive relationships.


160,000 children skip school every day in the U.S. in fear of bulling according to the National Education Association.


20% of students are victims of chronic bulling from kindergarten through 6th grade.


According to Mark Dombeck, Ph. D. the effect of bulling include:

   "In the short term:

• Anger
• Depression
• Anxious avoidance of settings in which bullying may occur.
• Greater incidence of illness
• Lower grades than non-bullied peers
• Suicidal thoughts and feelings (In one British retrospective bullying experiences survey I came across (of unknown scientific value), 20% of the sample attempted suicide secondary to having been bullied, whereas only 3% of participants who were not bullied attempted suicide).

   In the long term:

• Reduced occupational opportunities
• Lingering feelings of anger and bitterness, desire for revenge.
• Difficulty trusting people
• Interpersonal difficulties, including fear and avoidance of new social situations
• Increased tendency to be a loner
• Perception of self as easy to victimize, overly sensitive, and thin-skinned
• Self-esteem problems (don't think well of self)
• Increased incidence of continued bullying and victimization"

References & Recommendations:

http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/ 

National Association of African American Studies

Child-Psych: Effects of Bulling on Children with Special Needs

University at Buffalo: Effects of Bulling Behavior Serious for Both Parties, UB Psychologist Says,

MentalHelp.net: The Long Term Effects of Bulling